Infertility, Miscarriage & Adoption Loss

 

Hannah's Hope by Jennifer Saake

I would recommend this book to anyone who has dealt with any of these issues 

and also for those that love these people (great sections written for church ministry).  

Through God-ordained "random" events, He connected me to the book.

The incredible Biblical-perspective found in the pages was an amazing blessing to my life.

"Adoption Loss"...I didn't even know what to call it.

Many times in the loss of Symonne's referral I thought "I wish I had a friend to call up who has been down this road before" and "I wish there was a book written on how to process through all of this".

The book is largely about infertility and miscarriage, but there are many pieces about adoption loss also.  I was actually surprised about how many parts seemed to overlap with the "waiting stage" of adoption and the emotional roller coaster that it is (worthwhile read if you have been "in the waiting" for a long time).

A woman's journey...why does it help so much to "know" of others that have been through this?  Satan loves to use the tool of trying to "isolate" it is so good to expose how "normal" the feelings are.

Biblical...the amount of Scripture woven in the pages of this book is amazing!

I really can't say enough good about the blessing this book has been to me and pray that it will help better equip me when others share of their losses.

So thankful for the healing and hope the Lord brings!

Happy 15th Anniversary...

We are so thankful GOD is in the match-making business...He got it just right!

 

We were able to celebrate last week with a wonderful trip together!  It came at such a good time for us...a wonderful time, lots of relaxation, time to process through things, and just so much fun TOGETHER!

 

We praise God for His faithfulness and blessing!

Frosty for Father's Day...for a good cause

 

 Throughout Father’s Day Frosty Weekend – Saturday, June 15 and Sunday, June 16 –  participating Wendy’s will donate 50 cents from the sale of every Frosty product to support a national effort to match America’s foster children with prospective adoptive parents.  All Frosty products are included — including the newest treat, the Frosty Waffle Cone.

2013 marks the seventh consecutive year of Wendy’s Father’s Day Frosty Weekend. Last year, Wendy’s raised $1.5 million during the celebration, and hopes for $1.7 million this year.

“Nothing was more important to my dad than family, and that’s why he started the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption,” said Wendy Thomas, daughter of Wendy’s founder Dave Thomas who was adopted himself. “I can think of no better way of honoring fathers everywhere, and my dad’s legacy, than to raise a Frosty cone or cup and help another child find their forever father.”

 

 

Life as we know it (in pictures)...

Trying to update with our "life" as we know it.

Beginning of May...STUCK...we volunteered to help out with tickets, they didn't really need our help but the kids had a grand time eating as much popcorn as they could before we headed home.

 The next morning I flew to Summit for an amazing 24 hours.

It was a privilege to be there and to serve along side of Loving Shepherd Ministries.  It was fun to get to connect with friends from our current adoption agency, see old friends, my cousin, and to get to hear Karyn Purvis in person.  It was an amazing thrill to be there...I loved every minute!

I flew back the next morning because I had big plans with my hubby.

 We thought we had 2 trips to Ethiopia coming up sometime this summer so instead of another big trip...we had planned a fun overnight trip early...so we could celebrate our summer 15th wedding anniversary.  Travelzoo set us up with...a nice hotel, a dining certificate, Henry Ford museum and Greenfield Village...we had a great time together!

 Thomas Edison's chair...bolted to the same floor where he worked in this lab.

 And we got to try Lebanese food for the 1st time before we returned from our overnight trip!

We had done an overnight trip on Spring Break with our kids...this counted for our "summer vacation".  It seemed like everything was in fast forward and high speed to get it all in before Symonne came home.

 Random...a bird kept trying to build her nest on our mailbox.  She had accomplished all of this before we left for school one morning...I thought my mornings were busy!

 Mother's Day...out for breakfast before church.  Very blessed by my awesome husband and wonderful kids.

Insert here...Loss of Symonne's referral.  Our world was rocked. Life goes on but it feels different. 

 Blessed to see her having fun playing outside my kitchen window.

 Lilacs in amazing beauty.

 BJ's Sunday School class and families had a field trip to Redemption Ranch.  The Ranch rescues horses and uses them to help troubled teens.  Our kids really enjoyed their time.

 There is quite a clan of boys of about the same age at church...we are so thankful for their buddies!

 Ellyana had her last day of gymnastics.  She is an amazing "natural" and she really enjoys it but we are taking a break for now.

 Last day of library "Storytime".  She starts preschool next year...so this has been a fun year with gymnastics and storytime and lots and lots of time with Mommy...she is growing up so fast!

 We had a special few days with Grandma and she got to come to Zach's 1st grade musical program.

 We have been loving the weather and enjoyed a bike ride up-town and dinner, more bike riding and a stop for ice cream on the way home.  Times as a family have felt extra special lately.

 BJ determined to keep riding the trike.

 BJ's Lego Robotics, God has given him a good mind and lots of enthusiasm for building things and anything with robot design ("I could design a robot to do that for you, Mom" is one of his daily comments ;)

 Getting to meet up with an Ethiopian buddy, lots of similarities in our family stories...blessed by that!

 This little lady learned to ride her bike with NO training wheels.

 Exploring a bit.

 Proud as can be of being able to ride.  She wants to bike every chance she gets.  We knew she is crazy about biking when she left her piece of pizza to head back out to bike more (she LOVES pizza but she loves to bike even more).

 BJ's end-of-the-year "Talent Share"...he was the finale...he told jokes.  He really enjoys being in front of a group.  He did a great job and really had the crowd going ;)

 We have been enjoying Zach's baseball season.  He's got a good swing and his team is great this year.  These boys have been together for several years and I can't believe how much fun they are to watch.

 Our school's BIG end-of-the-year carnival type event.  The kids had a great time and it is really fun for the parents to get to be together too.

 Hard to believe you spend a ticket on getting your "broken arm" bandaged.  Always a line for this, it always amazes me.

BJ and Brian had fun taking tickets for the Dunk Tank (that is BJ's teacher in there).

Both boys have had INCREDIBLE years!  We thank the Lord for HIS continued faithfulness with school stuff, God has went beyond what we could ask or imagine!

It is a crazy week with the end of school but we have so much to be thankful for... 

36 hours till Summer Break!

3 years on this adoption journey

Yesterday, June 7 marked 3 years since we signed our adoption agency contract to begin this adoption journey that we felt God had called us to.

To "celebrate" we went to:

Yes, ANOTHER set of fingerprints.  We have lost count but probably close to 10 sets of fingerprints have been done for this adoption alone.  And no, our criminal status has not changed.

We had our Homestudy update visit this last weekend and we are in the midst of all the annual June paperwork updates.  

It has been a struggle to remain "up-beat" in the last flood of paperwork that is due.

To think 3 years ago, we were thinking if we got everything in...possibly we would be bringing her home the next summer.

We are thankful for people continuing to pray for us in this season.

God has been and always will be faithful!

Headed to Ethiopia...these totes have a story

 The "G" family is leaving this week for Ethiopia...they plan to serve long-term as missionaries there.  They have beautiful twin daughters from Ethiopia.  Our girls got to meet a couple of years back.  You can follow their family story at http://jonandamyg.blogspot.com/

So, as we thought we would be traveling on 2 trips soon to bring Symonne home... we offered to bring several of the "G" family totes as part of our luggage to get their belongings to Ethiopia.  The totes were given to Jon's sister who lives near us.  But with the news of Symonne's lost referral, 

we made a new plan.

Part of this family is headed to Ethiopia this summer to go on a short-term missions trip.  We were excited to get our family to connect with them.  You can follow their mission adventures at http://possibilityofmiracles.blogspot.com/ So the totes moved from our state to theirs with plans of going to Ethiopia this summer to be re-connected with the "G" family.

 Our kids had a great time together.  Brian and I enjoyed our time too...lots of similarities in our families' journeys...we are so glad the totes brought us together!

So 3 states later, these totes have only begun their adventures and so have these families!

Our family update...

To each of you who have been praying for our family…thank you! 

How are we doing with the loss of Symonne's referral...

The abbreviated version:  We are doing OK, by God’s grace!

The lengthy version:  Immediately following the loss of Symonne’s referral there was great loss.  A hole.  A pit.  An emptiness.  Our kids took the news very hard and we kept them home from school the next day and had a precious day being together as a family.  As we began to share with others the news, the Lord lifted us up.

He began to fill the emptiness with HOPE.  God does not waste anything.  We believe that He did not waste this referral on our family.  God knew what He was doing to sign us up for a lifetime of praying for this child.  Though we will never know on this earth what comes about in her life, we will continue to pray for her.  Our prayer would be that she would know the Lord and serve Him faithfully and amazingly.  And if God needed to perfectly position her in Ethiopia, He did it.  If He needed a family across the world (ours) to pray for this precious girl for the rest of her life and He did it…He signed us up!  And it is our privilege!

Oh, the ache of the loss has been real.  We each have processed it differently and that is OK.  The days following there were so many reminders of her…the delivery of the stuff I had ordered from Amazon for her and for our trips, the dresser that I had cleared out in Ellyana’s room, her pictures on our fridge, our summer calendar awaiting our travel dates, the list is endless of the reminders of her.

1st Sunday to Church Dress and hair clip

Blankets from Grandma

Rompers that had been ordered, delivered the day after we lost her referral...cute summer picture of the girls together!

 We would say there were 2 different aspects of the loss…the loss of her, to know her, to touch her, to hear her, to smell her, to love on her.  And then there was the loss of the plans, the dreams of the fulfillment of the waiting.  They each came in waves at different times.  

Thankfully, each day has felt less "raw".

God’s grace is so sufficient and as I thought many times…He wasn’t the least bit surprised by any of this.  He is so big!  We were so thankful for the amazing outpouring of love we felt from the many, many cards and messages we received.  I would read them over and over again letting reality sink in. The number of people praying has been amazing! There has been grief and loss and yet even greater is our hearts “feeling settled” and peaceful…it is a God-thing!

Through all of this as a family of 5, we have not felt that this has changed our heart that this is the adoption journey God still has us on.  With prayer and at the time we felt peaceful, we moved back on the “waitlist” for an infant girl.  We are at "#1" and waiting. A piece of our hearts and our prayers will continue to be with Symonne every time we remember her.  And we stand humbly before the Lord waiting to see who He has for our family in HIS perfect time.  God is so very faithful!  We count it a privilege to walk with Him and we continue to follow Him on this journey!

Our hope is in the Lord our God, the Maker of heaven and earth, the sea, and everything in them–
 the Lord, who remains faithful forever.  from Psalm 146